Reply With QuoteI thought this is serious when I read the title.
Types of computer viruses
Adam and Eve virus: Takes a couple of bytes out of your Apple.
Airline virus: You're in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore.
Anita Hill virus: Lies dormant for ten years.
Arnold Schwarzenegger virus: Terminates and stays resident. It'll be back.
AT&T virus: Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.
The MCI virus: Every three minutes it reminds you that you're paying too much for the AT&T virus.
Bill Clinton virus: This virus mutates from region to region and we're not exactly sure what it does.
Bill Clinton virus: Promises to give equal time to all processes: 50% to poor, slow processes; 50% to middle-class processes, and 50% to rich ones. This virus protests your computer's involvement in other computer's affairs, even though it has been having one of its own for 12 years.
Congressional Virus: Overdraws your computer.
Congressional Virus: The computer locks up, screen splits erratically with a message appearing on each half blaming the other side for the problem.
Dan Quayle virus: Prevents your system from spawning any child processes without joining into a binary network.
Dan Quayle virus: Simplye addse ane ee toe everye worde youe typee..
David Duke virus: Makes your screen go completely white.
Elvis virus: Your computer gets fat, slow, and lazy and then self destructs, only to resurface at shopping malls and service stations across rural America.
Federal bureaucrat virus: Divides your hard disk into hundreds of little units, each of which do practically nothing, but all of which claim to be the most important part of the computer.
Freudian virus: Your computer becomes obsessed with marrying its own motherboard.
Gallup virus: Sixty percent of the PCs infected will lose 38 percent of their data 14 percent of the time (plus or minus a 3.5 percent margin of error).
George Bush virus: Doesn't do anything, but you can't get rid of it until November.
Government economist virus: Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine.
Jerry Brown virus: Blanks your screen and begins flashing an 800 number.
Madonna virus: If your computer gets this virus, lock up your dog!
Mario Cuomo virus: It would be a great virus, but it refuses to run.
Michael Jackson virus: Hard to identify because it is constantly altering its appearance. This virus won't harm your PC, but it will trash your car.
New World Order virus: probably harmless, but it makes a lot of people really mad just thinking about it.
Nike virus: Just Does It!
Ollie North virus: Turns your printer into a document shredder.
Oprah Winfrey virus: Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB, and then slowly expands back to 200MB.
Pat Buchanan virus: Shifts all your output to the extreme right of your screen.
Paul Revere virus: This revolutionary virus does not horse around. It warns you of impending hard disk attack---once if by LAN, twice if by C:.
Paul Tsongas virus: Pops up on December 25 and says, "I'm not Santa Claus."
PBS virus: Your PC stops every few minutes to ask for money.
Politically correct virus: Never calls itself a "virus", but instead refers to itself as an "electronic microorganism".
Richard Nixon virus: Also known as the "Tricky Dick Virus", you can wipe it out but it always makes a comeback.
Right To Life virus: Won't allow you to delete a file, regardless of how old it is. If you attempt to erase a file, it requires you to first see a counselor about possible alternatives.
Ross Perot virus: Activates every component in your system, just before the whole thing quits.
Ted Kennedy virus: Crashes your computer but denies it ever happened.
Ted Turner virus: Colorizes your monochrome monitor.
Terry Randle virus: Prints "Oh no you don't" whenever you choose "Abort" from the "Abort, Retry, Fail" message.
Texas virus: Makes sure that it's bigger than any other file.
UK Parliament virus: Splits the screen into two with a message in each half blaming other side for the state of the system.
Warren Commission virus: Won't allow you to open your files for 75 years.
We help not because we need to but we help because we want to.........there's a big difference between "need" and "want"
Re: Types of computer viruses
I thought this is serious when I read the title.
What happens when an unstoppable force meets an unmovable object?
Re: Types of computer viruses
Just some things and names and their equal virus. These are real viruses. ^_^
We help not because we need to but we help because we want to.........there's a big difference between "need" and "want"
Re: Types of computer viruses
Nice collection, roi. What about 'Tiger Wood virus'?
Re: Types of computer viruses
Luckily my name is not listed in this computer virus. Have fun!
New Here need help
Hey I am new here. I am sorry if this is not the right place for this but I was hopingsome one here on Old Version Downloads - OldApps.com would be able to assist me. My computer has a BAD trojan,its slowing it down really bad. What is good software to remove it?
Re: New Here need help
What kind of Antivirus are you using right now. I wanna know.Originally Posted by unresenoMub
Happy are those who dream dreams and are willing to pay the price to make their dreams come true...
I used this
I noticed your post. I also had the same problem a month ago and after about 5 hours of searching I found Registryfix.com .And no this is not an affiliate link,it goes straight to main page. They gave me a free scan then I got the program really inexpensive,and it got rid of the Bug immediately and then my computer ran like a champ. I greatly recommend
Re: Types of computer viruses
spybot search & destroy helpsit's free too. be sure your firewall is up and that you don't download random things.
--- Letus
Re: Types of computer viruses
So how can we keep them away from our computer ?
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